How a Non-Contributing Husband Can Damage a Marriage—And What You Can Do About It in Georgia
It starts slowly. At first, you justify it—maybe he’s going through a rough patch or needs some time to find his motivation. But months or years later, you realize that your husband still doesn’t work, doesn’t help around the house, and doesn’t seem interested in changing.
You feel like you're carrying the weight of the entire household—financially, emotionally, and physically—while he lounges on the couch, immersed in video games, social media, or endless naps.
At The Sherman Law Group, our divorce lawyers speak to clients across Georgia who express a common frustration: “My husband is lazy, doesn’t contribute, and refuses to leave the house.”
These issues often lead to serious strain in a marriage and, ultimately, divorce. In this blog post, we explore the emotional, financial, and legal implications of having a husband who refuses to work or engage—and what you can do to reclaim your life.
The Emotional Toll of a Non-Contributing Spouse
1. Resentment Builds Over Time
Even the most compassionate spouses can only tolerate imbalance for so long. A marriage based on mutual effort becomes painful when one person constantly gives while the other takes. The resentment that builds can eat away at intimacy, trust, and emotional connection.
2. Feeling Trapped and Isolated
Many women in Georgia who come to us say they feel isolated and ashamed. They’re embarrassed by their husband’s behavior but don’t feel they can talk to friends or family about it. Some are worried about how divorce will look or if they’ll be judged for “giving up.”
3. Mental Health Impacts
Living with a lazy and dependent partner can lead to anxiety, depression, and chronic stress. You may feel like you're parenting an adult child instead of sharing your life with an equal partner.
Understanding Why Some Husbands Refuse to Work or Participate
While every marriage is unique, there are some common reasons men become disengaged from work, relationships, and responsibilities:
4. Mental Health Issues
Depression, anxiety, or other untreated mental health conditions may cause your husband to withdraw from work and daily life. However, even if the cause is clinical, it doesn’t absolve him from seeking treatment or making an effort.
5. Addictions or Obsessive Behaviors
Gambling, alcohol, pornography, gaming, or even online shopping can become obsessive, creating avoidance behaviors. He may be escaping from reality—at the expense of your marriage.
6. A Sense of Entitlement or Learned Helplessness
Some men were raised to believe that women should support the household while they relax or “find themselves.” Others may have been coddled and never learned to cope with real-world responsibilities.
7. Fear of Failure or Chronic Procrastination
Some individuals freeze when faced with expectations. Fear of rejection in the job market or chronic avoidance can lead to years of unemployment and inertia.
When Laziness Becomes Legal: Financial & Marital Consequences
8. Unequal Financial Burden
Many of our clients have supported their husbands for years—covering all the bills, car payments, mortgage, food, and even their husband’s personal expenses. In Georgia, this financial burden can play a role in the divorce settlement.
9. Marital Misconduct and Divorce Grounds
While Georgia is a no-fault divorce state, it also allows for divorce based on specific grounds—including desertion and habitual intoxication. Laziness alone doesn’t qualify, but it may be part of a larger pattern that legally matters.
10. Impact on Alimony
The court will consider each spouse’s contribution to the marriage and ability to support themselves when determining alimony. If your husband has willfully chosen not to work, it can impact how much (if any) support he may receive.
Your Legal Options: What You Can Do in Georgia
At The Sherman Law Group, we help spouses who are exhausted, angry, and ready for a change. Here’s what you can do if your husband won’t work or leave the house:
11. Understand Your Financial Rights
You may be entitled to a greater share of marital property if you’ve been the sole provider. Our attorneys can help you organize financial records, tax documents, and proof of your contributions.
12. File for Divorce Without His Cooperation
Many clients ask, “What if he refuses to leave or doesn’t agree to divorce?” You do not need his permission. In Georgia, one spouse can file unilaterally and begin the process.
13. Seek Temporary Orders
You can request temporary orders for possession of the marital home, financial support, or even temporary custody arrangements. This can help stabilize your situation while the divorce is pending.
14. Ask the Court to Remove Him From the Home
In some situations, especially where emotional abuse or financial control is present, it may be possible to request that your spouse vacate the marital home during divorce proceedings.
Children and the Lazy Parent: The Emotional Fallout
15. Children Notice Everything
Even if you try to shield your children from your husband's inactivity, they notice. They may internalize these patterns and think it’s normal—or resent the imbalance in their home.
16. Modeling Responsibility
If your husband isn't working, helping, or parenting, your children may be growing up without a proper model of what healthy adult behavior looks like.
17. Custody Implications
Judges in Georgia consider the best interest of the child when deciding custody. If your spouse has no job, doesn’t participate in parenting, and stays home all day, that may work against him in custody decisions.
Preparing to Leave: A Practical Checklist
18. Gather Financial Records
Bank statements, tax returns, credit card statements, loan documents—these can all help your attorney paint a clear picture of your household dynamics.
19. Document Your Contributions
Keep a record of what you pay for, how much you earn, and how you’ve supported the household. This can be useful for equitable division arguments.
20. Plan Your Exit Strategy
You don’t need to rush, but you do need a plan. Consider temporary housing, budget changes, and safety measures if necessary.
21. Consult a Divorce Lawyer Early
The sooner you speak with an attorney, the more options you'll have. A lawyer can help you create a legal roadmap based on your specific circumstances.
Why Women Stay (and Why You Don’t Have To)
It’s important to recognize that you are not alone. Many women stay in these situations due to guilt, finances, children, or fear of being judged. But it’s not selfish to prioritize your well-being. Staying in a one-sided marriage can do more harm than good—not only to you, but to your children and your mental health.
At The Sherman Law Group, we take a holistic approach to divorce. We understand that it’s not just a legal event—it’s an emotional and practical transformation. We guide you through every step with compassion and strength.
Frequently Asked Questions
1: Can I get divorced even if my husband refuses to leave the house?
Yes. Georgia law allows one spouse to file for divorce without the other's consent. You can still move forward legally, and the court may grant temporary possession of the marital home.
2: Will I have to pay alimony even if my husband hasn’t worked in years?
Not necessarily. The court will evaluate whether your husband is voluntarily unemployed, and that could reduce or eliminate any alimony obligation.
3: Can laziness be considered “marital misconduct”?
Not by itself. But if it's part of a broader pattern of neglect, abuse or abandonment, it may support a fault-based divorce.
4: What if I’ve supported him financially for years—will that help me in court?
Absolutely. Georgia courts consider financial contributions when dividing assets. Documentation of your support can help your case.
5: Will the judge consider my husband’s refusal to work when deciding custody?
Yes. Judges assess each parent's ability to provide a stable and supportive environment. Refusal to work or parent can affect custody outcomes.
6. What if my husband used to work but now refuses to get a job?
This is a common scenario. If your husband has become voluntarily unemployed or underemployed without valid justification, Georgia courts may consider this behavior in divorce proceedings, particularly when evaluating alimony and equitable division of property.
7. Can laziness be considered emotional or financial abuse?
While not always labeled “abuse” legally, chronic financial neglect and refusal to contribute can be extremely damaging. Courts may consider the broader impact on the marriage and household stability when deciding key issues in a divorce.
8. How do I know if my husband is genuinely struggling or just lazy?
Look for patterns. If he consistently avoids responsibility, ignores job opportunities, or refuses help, it may indicate willful laziness. If he shows signs of depression or anxiety, it could be a mental health issue requiring professional assessment.
9. Can I be forced to financially support my husband after divorce?
Possibly. If the court determines he’s entitled to alimony and is not willfully unemployed, you may be required to provide support. However, if you prove he's choosing not to work, the court may deny or limit spousal support.
10. Will the court impute income to my husband if he’s unemployed?
Yes, Georgia courts can “impute income” to someone who is voluntarily unemployed. That means the judge may assign him a theoretical income based on his education, work history, and available jobs.
11. What is voluntary unemployment and how does it affect divorce?
Voluntary unemployment means someone chooses not to work despite being capable. In a divorce, this can impact decisions about alimony and child support, potentially favoring the working spouse.
12. What if he insists he's a stay-at-home spouse but doesn’t do any housework or childcare?
A spouse who claims to be a homemaker but contributes little or nothing to the household may face challenges in court. You can provide evidence showing he’s not fulfilling that role.
13. What if he plays video games all day instead of working or helping?
This can be evidence of neglect or an unwillingness to participate in the marriage. Courts may consider this behavior when assessing support, custody, or division of assets.
14. Can I get a divorce if my husband won’t leave the house?
Yes. You do not need his cooperation to file. If necessary, you can request temporary orders from the court to grant you exclusive possession of the home during the divorce.
15. What if we have children and he’s a bad influence due to his laziness?
Georgia courts focus on the best interests of the children. If his behavior negatively affects the kids—emotionally, academically, or socially—it can impact custody decisions.
16. Can the court force him to get a job?
The court can’t directly force employment, but it can impute income or issue financial orders based on what he should be earning, not what he actually earns.
17. What should I document if I’m preparing to divorce a lazy husband?
Keep records of his refusal to work, efforts (or lack thereof) to find employment, financial contributions (or the lack of them), and how his behavior affects the household or children.
18. Does the court view men who refuse to work differently than women?
Courts aim to be gender-neutral, but societal expectations can sometimes influence perceptions. Regardless, the focus remains on each spouse’s ability and willingness to contribute.
19. What if I suspect he’s hiding assets or working under the table?
You should inform your attorney. Through discovery, subpoenas, and potentially a forensic accountant, hidden income or assets can be uncovered and presented in court.
20. How do I protect my own finances if he’s draining our accounts?
Open a separate bank account, freeze joint credit cards if appropriate, and start documenting all financial transactions. A temporary court order can help limit his access to marital funds.
21. Can his laziness be used as grounds for divorce in Georgia?
Georgia allows for no-fault divorce based on irreconcilable differences, but you can also cite specific grounds such as cruelty or desertion, which may include financial abandonment due to refusal to work.
22. Can I keep the house if I’ve been the one maintaining it financially?
Not automatically. However, the court considers who contributed to the home’s upkeep, who can afford it moving forward, and where the children will reside. You may have a stronger claim if you've paid the mortgage and utilities.
23. How does his laziness affect our debts?
If he’s accumulated debt or contributed little toward bills, the court may assign more of the debt to him. However, marital debt is often shared, even if one spouse was financially irresponsible.
24. What if he claims he wants to “start a business” but never does?
Repeated empty promises can show a pattern of avoidance. If there’s no business plan, income, or progress, you can use this to show he’s avoiding traditional work without producing results.
25. Will I be penalized for working long hours while he stays home?
Not usually. Courts respect your effort to provide. In custody cases, you’ll need to show that you maintain involvement in your children’s lives despite your work schedule.
26. What if I feel trapped because I make the money and he does nothing?
This is sadly common. Many clients feel burdened, exhausted, and financially stuck. Know that you have legal options, and a divorce can create a pathway to financial independence and peace.
27. Does the court care if I’ve tolerated this behavior for years?
Yes and no. Long-term tolerance doesn’t excuse his inaction, but the court may ask why action wasn’t taken sooner. Still, you have the right to seek change at any point.
28. Will a therapist’s report or psychologist’s evaluation help my case?
Possibly. If he’s undergone an evaluation, it could clarify whether his behavior stems from laziness, a mental health disorder, or both. This evidence can impact custody and support decisions.
29. What if he refuses to attend court hearings or respond to the divorce papers?
The divorce can still proceed. If he ignores the process, you can obtain a default judgment and the court will make decisions without his input.
30. How can The Sherman Law Group help in cases like this?
We have deep experience handling complex and emotionally charged divorces. If your husband refuses to work, contributes nothing financially, or won’t leave the house, we can help you protect your rights, secure your assets, and move forward with confidence.
31. Can I file for divorce in Georgia simply because my husband is lazy or won’t work?
Yes. Georgia is a no-fault divorce state, meaning you can file for divorce based on irreconcilable differences without needing to prove fault like laziness or unemployment.
32. Will the court care that my husband refuses to work?
Yes. A judge may consider your husband’s unwillingness to contribute financially, especially if it creates a hardship for you or your children, when deciding on alimony or division of marital property.
33. Can I be ordered to pay him alimony if I divorce him, even though he doesn’t work?
Possibly. If you earn significantly more than your husband, the court could award him alimony—even if he’s unemployed. However, the court will examine whether he is voluntarily underemployed.
34. What if my husband says he has mental health issues and that’s why he can’t work?
Mental health concerns are taken seriously in Georgia. You may need to provide or challenge medical documentation. It could affect spousal support, parenting plans, and even custody.
35. Does his laziness qualify as a form of marital abandonment?
Not necessarily. Marital abandonment usually involves one spouse leaving the marital home or ceasing to provide support. Laziness or failure to work may contribute to grounds for divorce but doesn’t constitute legal abandonment.
36. How do I prove in court that he chooses not to work?
You may use employment history, job opportunities he declined, testimony from others, or even social media evidence showing he's not seeking work.
37. If he won’t leave the house, can I force him to move out during divorce proceedings?
Possibly. You can file for a temporary protective order or request exclusive use of the marital residence as part of temporary divorce orders.
38. How does his lack of income affect our property division?
Georgia courts aim for equitable (not necessarily equal) distribution. If he hasn’t contributed financially, the court might adjust the division in your favor—but many other factors are considered.
39. Can I claim that he’s intentionally avoiding work to manipulate alimony or child support outcomes?
Yes. You can argue that he is “voluntarily unemployed,” and the court can impute income to him based on his skills, education, and earning capacity.
40. What if he says he’s a stay-at-home dad but doesn’t actually care for the kids?
You can challenge this in court with evidence (e.g., daycare records, testimony, or your own schedule). Courts expect stay-at-home parents to meaningfully contribute to childrearing.
41. Could I lose custody because I work and he stays home?
Not automatically. Courts prioritize the best interest of the child, which includes evaluating actual caregiving, stability, and parental involvement—not just who’s physically present.
42. What if his refusal to work is causing our family to go into debt?
This can be presented in court to show financial irresponsibility, which might affect asset division or alimony determinations.
43. Can I separate from him legally before filing for divorce?
Yes. Georgia law allows for legal separation (called a separate maintenance action), which can address child custody, support, and property issues while remaining legally married.
44. What if he’s addicted to video games or spends all day online instead of working?
You can bring this up during divorce proceedings as evidence of neglect or irresponsible behavior, especially if it affects finances or parenting.
45. Is it considered emotional abuse if he refuses to help around the house or get a job?
While not always legally defined as abuse, chronic neglect or manipulation can factor into a pattern of emotional distress, which may be relevant in custody or support decisions.
46. What if he works under the table and hides his income?
Your attorney can conduct discovery or hire a forensic accountant to trace hidden income. Courts can impute income if evidence shows he’s earning but not reporting.
47. How long will the divorce take if the primary issue is his laziness or refusal to leave?
Timelines vary, but contested divorces can take several months to over a year. His refusal to cooperate can delay things, but the court can compel participation.
48. Can I record conversations or interactions that show he’s lazy or manipulative?
Georgia is a one-party consent state, so you can legally record conversations you’re part of. These recordings may be admissible in divorce proceedings.
49. Will the judge think I’m being unfair or petty by calling him lazy?
It depends on how you present it. Stick to facts—his refusal to work, financial strain, and impact on the household. Avoid personal attacks.
50. What steps can I take now to protect myself financially if I’m planning to divorce him?
Start gathering financial records, open accounts in your name, and consult with a divorce attorney. Understanding your finances is critical if your spouse isn’t contributing.
You Don’t Have to Do This Alone: Georgia Divorce Lawyer Near Me
Living with a lazy, disengaged, and unemployed spouse can leave you feeling stuck, exhausted, and hopeless. But you are not trapped—and you are not alone.
At The Sherman Law Group, our divorce attorneys help women across Georgia take back their power, protect their assets, and move toward a life that’s balanced, supported, and fulfilling.
If your marriage has become a one-person effort, it may be time to consider your options. We’re here to help you understand your rights, your next steps, and your brighter future.
Call The Sherman Law Group today for a confidential consultation. Let us help you move forward with strength, strategy, and peace of mind.